


Before the Vote

by KailynBail



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Regrets, Reunions, Templars and Mages, before the vote
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-09
Updated: 2017-08-09
Packaged: 2018-12-13 08:23:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11755860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KailynBail/pseuds/KailynBail
Summary: Cullen wasn't always Commander Cullen... once... he was a just a gangling boy growing up in Honnleath. He had friends... best friends... and like so many other things in his past, he'd come to regret how that too ended... everything ended when the circle fell... and it haunts him still, like everything about that wretched place does. But things have a way of coming back around... as the saying goes.[This work is incomplete, I'm leaving fair warning here that I will be slow to update - but it's at a good stopping point at the moment]





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I added in some modern elements (photographs) because I wanted to (-snickers-) plus it works for my story!

_Skyhold…_

Cullen jiggled the key in the lock, the old ferelden not wanting to let go… but after a little coaxing a whole lot of cussing, he finally managed to get it off his trunk. One flipped lid later, he was staring down at things he hadn’t seen in… well… it had been awhile. Okay, a good long while. They’d been at Skyhold for nearly two months now… making nearly six months with the Inquisition for him… and nearly _three years_ since he’d seen the contents of the time capsul. He reached in, a slight tremor to his hand as he lifted out his father’s jacket. His sister, Mia, had thought to keep all of this stuff when he had packed it up and just sent it to her from Kirkwall. At the time, he hadn’t known where to put it and he couldn’t have taken it with him. He lifted the worn leather to his face, closed his eyes and took a deep breath in through his nose. It smelled of being cooped up in a damn box… but beneath that… the smell of leather… and the slightest twinge of his father. He only knew it was there because he knew what to look for… or rather, what to smell for. He set it on the desk… intent on putting it back in the trunk once he was done, he’d not risk having it out and about where something might happen to it. He smirked as he pulled out a whole pile of clothes… grateful he’d had the mind to ensure they had been clean when he put them in. He carried them all up the ladder and put them away. He was on his way _down_ the ladder when he heard the soft knock. A smile tugged at him… he knew exactly who it was. Swift steps carried him to the door, one bar slid over… “Evelyn.” He smiled softly and held it open for her. She was a vision, as she always was. He shut the door as soon as she was in, shutting out the chill in the night air.

Evelyn smiled in return. “And what are you up to?” She perked a brow at him, curiosity dancing in her hazel eyes.

Cullen snorted at her even though he reached and tucked a great deal of her auburn hair behind one of her ears. “Who says I’m up to anything?” At her look he shook his head. “No?” _Ut uh._ “Okay.” He gestured for her to follow, a good natured smirk dancing on his scarred lip. “Before I left Kirkwall, I sent my sister some of my things. They just arrived.”

Evelyn nearly melted into the intimate gesture, a little bit of a laugh given over the exchange. She followed, craning her neck to peek into the battered trunk once she was close enough. “That’s quite the turn around.” She knew it’d been years since he’d left the fabled city of chains.

Cullen nodded. “Indeed.” He reached in and started pulling out books… all pristine and all regarding the Chantry or the Templar order, next to nothing else.

Evelyn’s brows slowly rose over the reading material. “I take it you weren’t much for… reading?” She picked one up out of the box and eyed the spine only for him to snatch it playfully.

“Ha… ha… no.” He carried the stack over to the bookcase and started setting them in the row.

Evelyn chortled at his reaction as she leaned in, reached in, and pulled out a stack of papers. The man had _reports_ even here! She smirked as she leafed through them for a mere moment before… “Huh… well she’s pretty.” She pulled the photo out of the pile and turned it around to look at it properly, feeling that pull of jealousy. She couldn’t help it! She’d never let it show… but it was there, she’d never act on it… but it was there. She knew the woman in the photograph wasn’t either of his sisters, he had pictures of them that she’d already seen. “And impressive…”

Cullen’s brows furrowed at the tone… and the words too. “Huh?” He set the last book on the shelf and returned to her, tilting his head to the side as he leaned to look… _Maker’s breath._ He felt the corners of his mouth trying to curl upwards, a nostalgic smile wanting to form. “My goodness…” He slowly took the photo from her… allowing that smile to gently ease over his face, his entire expression softening. He ran his finger over the water in the bottom of the photograph, the waking sea churning beneath the woman who had her body arched beautifully, the shot taken at the precise moment before she would have brought her arms together to complete the dive, her robes fluttering well around her and behind her yet her upper body was held tight by her bodice, her arms bare to the world, her hair having yet caught up to the jump. He could swear… there for a heartbeat… he heard the seagulls cawing overhead, the waves lapping at the rock… smelled the salt in the air… heard the shutter of the camera…

Evelyn’s uneasiness near exploded over his reaction to the photo… the way he was… _of course he would have had other women in his life… before._ She had told herself that a million times… but her own insecurities always undercut her, she knew that was what it was… that it had nothing to do with her lack of trust in him. She cleared her throat quietly. “You must have loved her very much.” She offered, wanting to be respectful of his past and let him know in that moment that… she was okay with all of this though her stomach was knotting.

Cullen was jarred from the memory, he blinked rapidly and looked down at her with a perplexed expression before he barked out an incredulous laugh. “Hardly!” He could barely contain his laughter as he reached down into the trunk and slid papers around… searching… where… were… _ah!_ He pulled out a small stack of photos… his heart slamming around in his chest as he carded them rapidly before he found the one he was looking for. He pulled it out and offered it to her, keeping the previous picture tucked between middle and ring fingers. “If you wish to know who loved her… it was that man right there.”

Evelyn was… quickly confused. But she watched… and then took the offered photo. There was that woman again… only… she was held on the back of another man, this man was a stark contrast to Cullen though they were much younger than he was now. Both in the picture were smiling wide, obviously captured in the middle of a hearty laugh over something or someone. “Oh.” She said it quietly as she looked at the picture.

Cullen nodded. Oh, he knew she was prone to jealousy… he was flattered by it, honestly. Though he knew there was no reason for her to feel that way. He looked down at the picture and nodded but still felt that same old pull… that regret, the heartache. He flipped through the small stack of pictures and pulled out one of just the man, offering that to her as well. “Ser Markus Vale.”

Evelyn’s eyes flared at the provided picture. Cullen’s deep chuckle followed. _It was taken on holiday, thus the lack of a shirt. I wish I had another one of him, but that’s the only one I have that is of just him._ She looked at the man in the photo… he was built as Cullen was, as all templar men were… strong and proud, but he wore a beard and his hair was a bit longer. His eyes though, they were piercing and dark in their intensity, even at rest. He had… she narrowed her eyes as she tried to make out the writing… a tattoo on his forearm. “Sa…l…”

Cullen felt himself go quiet inside… sorrow tugging at his heart something fierce. “Salroka.” He supplied the answer, absentmindedly settling his hand on his own forearm… where his own tattoo rested, though Evelyn had never seen it… they hadn’t gone _there_ yet. “It’s a dwarven term… it means, one at my side.”

Evelyn didn’t see Cullen touch his arm… she looked back to the other picture, the one with Markus and the woman. “She’s another templar then?” She could practically feel the way Cullen’s spine went rigid. _Oh… ut oh._ She chanced a look at him, he was purposefully looking back into the trunk, his jaw set. “… She was a mage… wasn’t she?”

Cullen had one last photograph he wanted to show her but then she had asked _the question_. He was tapping the edge of the picture on the inside rim of the trunk lightly before he finally answered her. “Yes. Jessica Milliard.” He shook his head and lifted a hand, rubbing at the back of his neck roughly before he just… walked away. He went over to one of the chairs in the corner and all but fell down into it with a heavy sigh. Evelyn followed, as he knew she would, she sat in the other chair, the fire from the hearth dancing on her beautiful features. She was looking at him with a whole lot of question in her eyes but she wasn’t going to ask… but she wanted to know. He sighed again before he offered her the final photo. It was of him and his brothers… Markus was in the picture as well. There were seven templars in the photo all together. He had already told her of what had happened at Kinloch Hold… but he’d understandably kept the details to a minimum.


	2. Chapter 2

Evelyn cast a worried look at Cullen before she took the photo and let her gaze fly over the men. All templars, all smiling… all _flexing_ their muscles in a silly way for the camera. All standing… right in front of Kinloch hold. There was that man Markus, right beside Cullen, both leaning against each other dramatically in a rather humorous manner. _Maker… he was at the tower… oh no…_ “I’m so sorry, Cullen.” She started, sympathy in her voice.

Cullen heard that tone and immediately waved her off. “Markus is alive, last I knew.” He saw the questions explode in her eyes. He took a heavy breath, slouching in his chair as he fidgeted with some loose stitching on the arm of it. “Markus and I grew up together… no more than three houses apart in Honnleath.” He cleared his throat, gesturing lazily. “We got into all sorts of trouble, being nearly the same age… we often left my younger brother behind whenever we ventured out of the village in search of excitement.” He smirked and shook his head at the memories of all the trouble they used to get into. “Jessica… lived on the edge of town.” He saw the shock in her features, it wasn’t overly there but it was there. “She didn’t come into her magic until she was ten… so we all had quiet a few years of mischief under our belts by the time the templars came to the village to collect her.” He frowned and shook his head in a way that said it was a shame, he felt that way then and he felt that way now… but in between the two points of his life, he knew he didn’t feel as such. “Markus was beside himself… and swore he was going to become a Templar… just so she wouldn’t be alone. We were all… so close.” He took a heavy breath. “Naturally… I couldn’t let him go alone…” He lead on. “So… when we were thirteen, we left for training. It took years… and honestly, I had started to forget about Jess… he never did, though.” He swallowed against the well of emotion. “We grew even closer… we were neck and neck through every test, every benchmark, everything. And when we finally took our vows… we did so side by side. At that point, I knew the likelihood of us even remotely being sent to the same circle that she was in… were… well… remote.” He saw Evelyn nod in agreement, she knew… she understood… she had been in the circle as well. “But… hell, Markus swore the Maker himself intervened. We weren’t at Kinloch Hold for a week before we were stationed in the circle’s lower library… five minutes of standing there and… in she walked. It had been years and honestly, I didn’t recognize her.” _But he did._ She said with a small hint of a smile. Cullen smirked a bit and nodded. “In a heartbeat. That night, I went with him and we snuck into the mage’s quarters… she had just passed her harrowing before we arrived, see… and that night, damn, Evie… it was like those years hadn’t even passed. Of course we got caught… and… reprimanded. Markus more than myself for how he challenged the severity of her punishment over ours…” He shook his head. “I… I would like to say that I learned my lesson as did they… but…” _Nope._ He chuckled with a certain amount of mischief dancing in his eyes. “Not even a little. We routinely bribed other Templars to change shifts and routes to ensure we were in the same halls and rooms as she… she passed notes to us, us to her. I think I saw it before they did.” _What?_ “That they loved each other.” He reached and laced his fingers with hers lightly. “I tried to talk some sense into Markus… I knew how impossible it was… I wasn’t blinded by that feeling in my heart… but… he’d not hear of it. I knew I couldn’t sway him… so I tried talking to her. That didn’t work either so I begged them to at least be careful. And they were… I don’t think a soul outside myself ever knew.” He felt the chill settle into his chest at the memories that came next, he tightened his hold on her hand. “When the circle fell… it was only because of Jess’ warning did we even know something was wrong… she had come to tell us… she’d already been injured, badly. We rallied as best we could, gathered as many loyal mages as we could… but… ultimately… well, you know.” He saw her nod, though his vision shook slightly as _things_ pulled at him. “Markus’ visceral prison was across the hall from mine… I could… hear him… whenever they went after him. Just as he could hear me. It… wasn’t so bad whenever they left us alone… but Markus was… he was going mad so quickly.” Cullen shuddered over the memories.

_“Jess?! Jessica!!!!”_

_“Markus! Shut up! They’ll hear you!” Cullen strained against the binds that held him, binds he couldn’t see. He could hardly make his friend out through the waves in the air._

_Markus strained, pulled, pushed, thrashed, kicked… he was… exhausted beyond reason but panic drove him on. “I haven’t heard her in two days, Cullen! What if… oh Maker… what if they’ve taken her!?” He swallowed the despair that flooded him. “Jessica!! You answer me right now!!!”_

Cullen closed his eyes tightly and shook his head, pressing the heel of his hand to his brow. He felt Evelyn’s other hand on his forearm. “Markus screamed his throat raw trying to call out to her… I didn’t have the heart to tell him that she was probably already dead or enslaved.” He covered her hand and rubbed at her wrist comfortingly. “I know now that we were there for two months like that… but at the time, I had no concept of time… Markus did though, I don’t know how, perhaps he had a window in the room he was being kept in. But he knew exactly how long it had been since he’d heard her…” He paused for a moment. “Since he’d heard her screams.” He shook his head at the whole thing. “When the Warden came… I thought he was an apparition… but only because of who stood at his side. By the time he had gotten there… I hadn’t heard Markus in what felt like forever… I thought I was the only one left. So when I saw him… standing with Wynne… and Jessica… I thought him an illusion, sent to torment me further.” He sighed heavily and shook his head again, forcing himself to move on in his memory. “She had fallen into the fade… that was how she protected herself. She sought to protect both Markus and I that way… but couldn’t get close enough. Thus, when the Warden approached… she was still alive, Wynne was the one who brought her back. She immediately went to Markus… but he was so badly wounded, he would not wake… she escorted them to me… I…” He shook his head, feeling the shame cut him deep. “I wasn’t very grateful for my rescue.”

Evelyn nodded slightly, she knew of the man he once was, what he had turned into immediately following his imprisonment. “What… what happened to them? It sounds as though you three were very close.”

Cullen nodded, looking down at the pictures that were now scattered on the small conversation table in front of them. “We were.” He cleared his throat, trying to push past the lump that had formed there. “We were all sent to the Bannorn Circle in Jainen. But…” He frowned as he focused on the image of him and his brothers, including Markus. “I just wasn’t the same…” _I doubt they were either._ “True enough. They didn’t turn on each other though… not like I did.” He saw the confusion flicker on her brow. “I… my hatred drove a wedge between Markus and myself… I pushed him to see supposed reason where Jessica was concerned. I… didn’t trust that she remained free of corruption after what all had happened at Kinloch.” He rubbed his hands together slowly, the subtle scraping of his calouses doing little to calm his nerves. “I… openly challenged him, more than once… threatened to expose them.” He shook his head at himself _again._ “Yet another thing I am not proud of. Markus… took some _concerns_ of his to the Knight Commander… and I was transferred to Kirkwall. Which… I was furious over at the time… but now I understand how easy it was for the Commander to see me as being marginally unstable and needing firmer guidance.” He felt Evelyn’s hand cover his own again, he held it gently. “I… I don’t know what happened to them after that… I assume they are either out there on their own or with the rebel mages… I can’t imagine they have joined any other faction.” _We could… try to—_ “No… I wouldn’t even know where to start looking, Evelyn… I just… it’s better if I let them have their peace from me.” His look spoke volumes about the pain in his heart where the two of them were concerned.

Evelyn gave him a reluctant nod, she’d respect his decision though she didn’t agree with it. He was obviously a much different man now than he once was… he also obviously cared a great deal for his childhood friends.


	3. Chapter 3

“Oh, Markus… I don’t know.” Jessica gave him an unsure look as she bolstered the fire in front of their tent.

Markus offered her a gentler look in return. “The Inquisition is the only force that is aiming to do anything about the hole in the sky… plus the Inquisitor is a _mage_.” He gave her a look that said _come on_.

Jessica wasn’t entirely convinced. “I… I don’t know. They’re very close to the chantry.” It wasn’t that she disliked the chantry… it was just that… well, mages, templars… the chantry was the one who pitched them against each other in the first place.

Markus let out an exasperated sigh before he stood up from his crouched position, having been securing the tiedowns of their tent. He walked over to her and sat just behind her, wrapping around her entirely… arms around her waist, pulling her in against him, his chin settling on her shoulder. “If the word on the road is to be believed, the chantry has denounced the Inquisition in its entirety… I don’t think we’ll have to worry about them.”

Jessica’s expression went very disinterested when he started muttering in her ear. “Fine.” She still didn’t trust the Inquisition.

Markus woke her with the sun and shortly after they were back on the road. The horses he had won from the horse master’s daughter the week before were a blessing. They had… a lot of road to cover. The roads weren’t exactly safe… but between his sword arm and Jess’ magic… they traversed half of Ferelden without major incident.

Markus pulled his scarf further around his neck, tightening it down against the bitter cold of the Frostbacks, his no nonsence brown eyes peering up at the massive hold in the mountains. “Maker…” he breathed. He glanced to Jess.. she was bundled up inside his Mother’s old coat and a thick fur lined hood… her blue eyes were almost as crisp as the ice that dotted the landscape around them. “Think they’re compensating for something…”

Jessica rolled her eyes at him and nudged the mare, getting her moving again. “Markus… please.” _What? I’m serious, look at the size of this place, a little over kill…_ She chortled at his tenor, hearing the laughter dancing in it. “If the Inquisitor were a man, I’d say you were on to something but as such…” She offered a shrug.

Markus smirked, his expression hidden behind the wool. They entered the hold, the… surprisingly busy hold. There were people coming and going, all walks of life really… elves, dwarves, even Qunari. They were directed to the stables… obviously, they couldn’t very well take their horses with them. There… Markus was told that should he wish to join, he should see the Commander of the forces and was pointed in the direction of the Commander’s office. He looked over his shoulder at Jess… saw her uncertainty as she was told where the Mage’s tower was located and that Enchanter Fiona and Enchanter Vivienne would be able to tell her more. He mouthed the words to her _I’ll meet you at the tavern in two hours._ She nodded to him and disappeared into the crowd. Markus was… damn, he didn’t even know. There were _so_ many people here. Apparently they weren’t the only ones who thought joining up was a good idea. He climbed the stairs… crossed the battlements… and looked up at the Ferelden banners that were tacked up on the Commander’s tower… and at the open door. He pulled his hood and scarves down when he stepped in, kicking at his own boots out of habit alone. The lower floor of the tower was abuzz with activity. He saw a man who looked… kind of important? He was standing at a small desk… a lot of soldiers were milling about it. He squared his stance, one hand settling on the hilt of his sword, the Templar emblem catching the fell light as he moved, side stepping around some of the men to get closer. “Excuse me?”

Knight Captain Rylen looked up at the deep voice that had just broken through his concentration, a quick look over the man and he knew he was once like himself, like the Commander, he was once one of the Order. He thrust a hand out to him, his expression shifting just slight. “Knight Captain Rylen.”

Markus did the same as the man had done to him, his accent slammed him firmly in the realm of the Free Marches, Starkhaven if he remembered properly. He didn’t hide the subtle relief in his eyes as he clapped his hand around the man’s forearm. “Knight Commander Markus. Though… I don’t use that title much anymore.” He had leaned in with a good natured smirk tugging at him with those last words.

Rylen gave his own chuckle and nod, a firm grip before he released him and was released in turn. “Nor I. It does ring a bit hollow now, doesn’t it?” They shared a grin of comradery before he shifted his weight. “I suspect you only just arrived?”

Markus likewise shifted, settling into a comfortable stand, the other soldiers still milling about though the crowd had started to thin a bit. He folded his arms over his chest, his coat and traveling cloak both parting by the wayside, simple armor being revealed, nowhere near the extravagance that he had once worn. “Hnn, yes. My wife and I, just a few moments ago.” He made it a point to mention Jess… though, she was hardly his wife. Funny how he could so easily speak of her as such to others but to her? He felt his voice abandon him entirely when it came to talks of such commitments.

Rylen gave a sage sort of nod, many men had brought their families, seeking refuge. “I’ve no notion of where we could house your—“

Markus held a hand up to cut him off gently. “She has already been sent to the Mage’s… tower…” He loathed the word. “I suspect she’ll be receiving similar assignments though I’d prefer if we could remain together.” He saw the man’s expression shift, go through a bevy of different thoughts, he wasn’t the first to look at him that way and he would not be the last. “We’ve been fighting by each other’s side for many years.” He supplied as a reason for his preference.

Rylen’s lips formed a thin line, old views pressing upon him. “I see.” He cleared his throat and glanced down at his roster listings. “I… well…” He frowned, his brow furrowing deeply. “I am certain we can find something for you and yours to do.” He glanced at the man’s sword, it was broad and lengthy but not overly heavy… he was a warrior but not a rogue, where was his shield though… huh, no matter. “Unfortunately, the barracks are already full to capacity, we’re being forced to house the bulk of our forces in the valley below.” He looked up at him again. “That won’t be a problem, I hope.”

Markus smirked at him. “We’ve been camping for quite some time, I’ll not bauk at the allure of a protected valley.”


	4. Chapter 4

Cullen walked in like a gust of strong wind, fresh from the war room with new assignments and new headaches. He glanced over at Rylen in a distracted manner when the man called out a greeting… around the few soldiers that still milled about, to his own desk… he suddenly stopped so fast he nearly fell. He turned slow… his brow held down, confusion and yet… more… on his features. _Impossible…_ he swallowed against the sudden tension in his throat as he openly stared at the man who was still speaking with Rylen. He looked… so familiar, but that was impossible.

Markus had glanced at the Commander when Rylen had greeted him. _Commander_. He could tell the man was obviously busy since he’d hardly acknowledged the Knight Captain at all, he’d not press a meeting, not yet. But… he looked so familiar. _You’re just tired._ He returned his own attention to Rylen, falling into talks concerning where he could gain supplies… who he’d be reporting to directly… the layout of the valley below, all of the details that came with a new assignment. Though it had been years since he’d had one… he hoped Jess was faring as well as he was.

Rylen was nearly done getting Markus squared away. Damn, he was easy to talk to. He had that air of confidence and surety that only seemed to come from the higher ranking members in the Order… the Commander had it too. It was a _presence._ It was if they demanded respect without even knowing it. “Well… I believe that’s all, Markus… you should get heading down to the valley soon, they’ll be serving chow in a few hours. I’ll meet with you later tonight, once you’re all settled—“ He blinked as he caught sight of the Commander in his peripheral.

Cullen was still staring… he couldn’t look away. _Look at me._ That’s what he wanted to say, he wanted to walk right over there and just get a better look himself. But he couldn’t… he couldn’t make his boots move at all. All he could see was a scant profile… he spoke quietly, held his tenor low… but then Rylen said _Markus_. He started for them immediately, sure of it now. He reached first, he… he was certain now. His hand went to the man’s shoulder, sliding to grip at his neck, brow furrowed, eyes intense, jaw set, throat tight, lungs burning.

Markus heard the bootfalls before he even turned, it was on that turn to face whoever was approaching that he felt the hold, the _grab_ , it jarred him but not near as jarring as who had done it. His breath immediately started to saw… for a couple of tense heartbeats, he just stared into a face that he never thought he’d see again. He felt the hold on the side of his neck tighten… he turned entirely, stepped, slapped his arms around the Commander, pulling him in fiercely. “ _Son of a bitch._ ” He said it rough, feeling the embrace returned, near crushing in its strength.

Cullen couldn’t think outside of this moment. Markus, having always been just an inch or two taller than he spoke against his ear and fur mantel alike. _God damn it, Cullen… I thought you were dead._ He heard more rough words slip past his lips, his voice strained. Cullen slammed his eyes shut, feeling a tremble run through him before he pulled away and framed the man’s jaw with his hands, he could scarcely believe it. “I… I never thought I would see you again.”

Rylen’s brows had perked high and remained there the entire time… as did just about every remaining soldier in the room. Rylen cleared his throat respectfully… trying to… well… he wasn’t going to judge the Commander but… certain things should be kept private.

Markus gripped the man’s shoulders, what he could find under all that fluff! He gave a shake of his head before Rylen’s discretionary intervention caught his attention. He took a deep breath and shook his head at Cullen. “You?! What about me? The _Commander_ of the _Inquisition?_ ”

Cullen didn’t miss the intervention either. He balked at Markus before finally letting him go but not entirely, he left a hand on his shoulder, as if he still couldn’t believe he was truly there. “Rylen…” He cleared his throat. “Markus… damn.” He had to discretely wipe at his eyes. “We grew up… three houses—“

Markus chuckled but interrupted. “I think it was two… or was it four? Jess would know, she always had a better memory than I.”

Rylen blinked… _oh!_ He and the rest of the soldiers all gave a subtle nod and small smile… childhood friends suddenly reunited after everything that had gone on in the world? No wonder they embraced as they had. “Ah… well… we should give you both time to catch up.” He gestured and it took no time before they all left the Commanders to themselves.

Cullen waved Rylen off in a distracted manner… once they had all gone, he still just stared at Markus. He was obviously older and it showed… his hair was still sort of shaggy… he still wore a beared… he had a fierce scar on his face though, it ran nearly the length of his brow and into his hairline, but it had a subtle shimmer to it saying it had been healed with magic. “You know where Jess is?”

Markus gave Rylen a bit of a nod as he left. He looked at Cullen with a certain amount of releif mixed with joy. “Know? Well, last I checked she was over at your Mage tower getting her own assignments.”

Cullen’s eyes flared. “She’s _here_?”

Markus had to bark out a laugh over that look. “Of course, she’s here. I’m here, aren’t I?” He shook his head at him and started for the door.

Cullen quickly caught up, he was still. “This is… providence. I was just telling Evie about you two last night.”

Markus’ brow twitched as he looked over at him while they walked the battlements. “Evie?”

Cullen blushed for a moment, clearing his throat and straightening his posture. “The uh… I mean, Inquisitor Trevelyn.”

Markus sent one brow high upon an arch as he gave Cullen a knowing look. “Got your hand in the cookie jar, hmm?” He barked out another laugh and quickly hopped away from the look Cullen shot him though there was no real need… Cullen had apparently lost his playfulness.

Cullen was… he just… it was like Markus hadn’t changed at all. He lead him through another tower, this one was still under construction… they left that one when Cullen’s steps stilled. “Evelyn.” He said it with all the shock running into her out of nowhere required.

Evelyn’s eyes widened at Cullen’s shocked tone… it was as if she had caught him doing something he wasn’t supposed to be doing? But.. her eyes flicked to the man beside him, back to Cullen before she actually jumped slightly. “It’s him!” She actually pointed at the man. “Markus!”

Markus’s brows were so high, his forehead was creased many times over. “Um…”

Cullen gave her a smile before he nodded. “Yes. Markus… This is Inquisitor Evelyn Trevelyn.”

Markus looked to the woman with the doe eyes and red hair… _oh, oh my. No wonder Cullen got a sweet tooth._ He stepped closer and gave her a knowing grin, eyes narrowed in mischief. “Hmm…” He took her offered hand and held it just below his lips, poised but he’d not follow through, his lips were for one and only one. “Pleasure is all mine, it’s not every day I get to meet Cullen’s woman.”

Cullen’s cheeks flared as did Evelyn’s. Before he even knew it, he had shoved Markus’ shoulder in a way he had once done when they were close. Markus’ response was a deep chuckle as he dropped her hand. “You’re a menace.” He muttered.

Evelyn’s cheeks scalded before she watched the two of them. “The.. pleasure is all mine, Markus. Cullen told me about you just last night… this is most fortuitous.”

Cullen gave a subtle nod though Markus only smirked again.

Markus smirked. “Quite. Now…” He clapped and rubbed his hands together. “I’ve a hankerin’ of my own.” He pointed both index fingers towards the mage tower.

Cullen rolled his eyes but gestured for Evelyn to come with them as they started moving again. “Jessica is apparently at the mage tower.” Evelyn gave him a shocked sort of look, he returned it.

“No apparently about it, she’d better still be there.” Markus’ tenor came out a bit harsher than he’d intended but he was… well… they’d only just arrived. He chose not to look at Cullen for a moment or two before they approached the closed door to the tower. He reached for the knob but Evelyn was the one who pulled it open and breezed on in. Markus gave Cullen a sort of approving look, the corners of his mouth pitched down before he strolled right on in after her.


	5. Chapter 5

Jess had been speaking with Grand Enchanter Fiona… since Enchanter Vivienne was not there today, for whatever reason. She was nearly done when the door opened just to their left… in walked… a woman and… her smile started only to die immediately. “Maker’s breath…” She set a hand to the colomn of her throat… her eyes immediately stung. It took _no_ time before she was against him, arms around his neck tightly, blinking rapidly as she fought the tears, her voice thick and wet sounding. “ _Cullen Stanton…_ god damn you.”

Cullen nearly stumbled backwards from the force of the embrace, the fact that Markus chuckled was lost on him, his ears buzzed… he swallowed Jess in his hold, she being so small, much smaller than Evelyn was. Her words no less emotional than Markus’ had been. “I’m… I’m so damned sorry.” His eyes were closed tight as he bowed his head and just stood there, shaking slightly as he tried to keep himself composed.  

Evelyn stared… but she noticed the difference in the way Cullen embraced the short statured woman. He clung to her as if she were one of the Mothers in the chantry, as if she could grant him absolution for his sins. Not as a lover.

Markus cleared his throat after a moment. “All right, that’s enough of that.” He playfully started tugging the two apart… but only just. “You’ll steal all the warmth to be had from this… this… whatever this is.” He poked and fluffed at Cullen’s.. fur?

Cullen chuckled low, shaking his head and listing away from Markus’ teasing after releasing Jess. Damn, she looked… almost exactly the same.

Jess sniffled and rolled her eyes at Markus. “Leave him alone… you know he was always one for fashion.” She chortled at the look Cullen sent her. She met Markus’ eye for a moment, a silent conversation slid between them before she turned to pin Evelyn with a surprised look. “Oh, really now?”

Evelyn’s brows raised in question but it was Cullen who spoke, he pointed at both of them. “Oi, none of that.”

Markus just smirked and excused them all from the Grand Enchanter. He… was starving. And he said just that once they were back onto the battlements. “Tell me, is it customary to starve your new recruits?” He questioned Cullen as he fished a hand rolled cigarette out of his pocket, put it between his lips all while slipping his arm around Jess’ shoulders, he tilted his head to the side, her hand rising up, thumb and forefinger rubbing together to generate a flame for him.

Cullen turned to answer but witnessed their synchrony… and damn did he miss that. Jess’ open use of magic spoke of how long they had been doing as such which had question press against him. “Of course, how else can we get them to fight so hard?”

Evelyn gawked at Cullen’s answer, she turned and was about to rebut it but Markus, having exhaled, beat her to any words. “Ah! You pay in food, I see how it is. Well, my dear, so much for joining the armies of the faithful. I’ll not work for anything less than wenches and horrible tavern ale.” He jumped when he felt Jess dig her fingers into his ribs, right there in the joint of his armor. He tossed Cullen a wink.

Cullen shook his head at them. “Horrible.” He gestured towards the tavern… once inside, he held Evelyn’s chair for them as they took a table on the top floor.

Evelyn wasn’t quite sure what to make of this… Markus. He seemed… far more unrefined than Cullen. When the tavern waitress approached, she half expected him to hit on her… but he simply leaned back in his chair and draped his arm over the back of Jess’ and allowed her to order for him… and she did as if this were simply how they did things. “So… you have to—“ Her voice died out as she watched Jess set a small black case on the table and unzip it, a tool kit being revealed. She… instantly grew uncomfortable and looked sharply at Cullen.

Cullen was just happy to see both of them… the tool kit come to bare did nothing to him. He caught Evelyn’s look though and cleared his throat, leaned in and whispered in her ear. _Markus was hexed by a blood mage a year after we arrived at the circle… he has to take regular injections of a special potion lest the sickness in his body overrun him._ He pulled back just as Markus listed to the side, having unbuckled some of his armor and lifted his shirt, exposing a slash of hip for Jess to stab with a needle, the man didn’t so much as wince, thus was the way of things when you were so used to things like this.

Evelyn watched as… again… it was just simply part of their world. Jess had just put everything away when she looked to the Inquisitor and Cullen both, she leaned in and narrowed her eyes playfully. “So… how long have you two been together?” She couldn’t help but laugh a bit as Cullen’s eyes bulged and Evelyn nearly choked on the sip of ale she had just taken.

Markus didn’t mind laughing at all. “How… _serendipitous_ that you would find yourself a mage, Cullen.” His laughter still shook his voice but the way he looked at him… well… it was rather… hypocritical of him.

Cullen didn’t miss the look, it succeeded in quickly chilling him. He was about to speak but Jess shot Markus a serious look.

Jess eyed the man. “Mind your tongue, Markus.” When he shot a look at her in return, she shook her head no at him. “Let it rest in the past where it belongs.” She nearly hissed at him. “What I want!” She said a bit louder, returning her attention to Cullen and his woman. “Are details! Come, come…” She waved in a beckoning motion. “Tell me all.”

Evelyn hadn’t missed the sudden tension… she was… well, she had wondered if this was going to happen. Jess however, appeared to not want to revisit those memories. Her exuberance was refreshing though. She leaned in and cleared her throat. “We um.. no one knows.” She sat back and took another sip of her ale.

Jess blinked at the woman. “Oh darling… you are the _Inquisitor_. And a noble woman, you can be with whomever you like.” She saw the look on Cullen’s face as he grew even more uncomfortable. Her mind dove into his… gently but there. _Please don’t tell me that this is a secret because she is a mage, Cullen._

Cullen’s features twitched as he felt that push. His eyes flicked up to Jess… _Of course not. It’s because the whole of the world watches her so closely, a single misstep could cost the Inquisition immeasurably. And our private life is something I cherish and want desperately to stay private. You’d be horrified to learn of the many rumors that have already begun about her._

Markus had readjusted his armor… his lips forming a thin line as he focused on his cigarette and ale both. He could feel the subtle tickle on his skin… he knew Jess was talking to Cullen silently. He didn’t mind, he never did. He wasn’t the jealous type, Jess was his in all ways… he was secure in that thinking. But he could still remember how hateful Cullen had been. True, he was glad to see him, glad to be around him again… he just hoped that this man before him had purged all of that hate from his body since then. The entire time they had their quiet talk, Evelyn went on about how they had to keep it under wraps due to the political implications. He snorted at her explanation. “You might as well be speaking Qunlat for all the sense politics make to me.” He exchanged an _I know right_ look with Cullen.

Jess softened her gaze at Cullen, grateful that it wasn’t due to Evelyn’s magic, this secret of theirs. She rolled her eyes at Markus and Cullen both. “Men.”

Evelyn was the one who leaned in this time. “Now, since I cannot so freely give details about me and mine… Cullen told me a bit last night but I have to know… what happened after… well.” She cleared her throat and cast a sidelong look to Cullen before looking back at Jess. “What happened after Cullen went to Kirkwall?”

Cullen’s spine went rigid for a moment before he sighed heavily and leaned back, grateful to the waitress for the food she just deposited. Jess and Markus both had the stew while he had the roasted tarmagan as always… and Evelyn was partial to the mutton. “I’m curious to that as well.” He didn’t miss the short but hard look Markus sent him over that.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Talk of a child's death are in this chapter. :( :( :( I don't want to post a spoiler before the chapter itself but I wanted to put a warning up here.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Talk of a child's death are in this chapter. :( :( :(

Markus finished his bite and cleared his throat before speaking. “Well… we were there for… what? Another year and two months? Three?” _Four._ Jess provided the answer and he nodded. “Before we left.” He took a swallow of ale. _Where did you go?_ Cullen asked him, the man had a bite poised but hadn’t taken it… the curiousness and concern in his eyes was genuine. Damn him. He cleared his throat and gave him a sort of _eek_ look. “Well… Jainen was one of the circles that started using the right of Tranquility as a punishment as opposed to controling unstable mages.” He glanced at Jess, his expression notibly softening entirely. “I couldn’t risk her that way. By then, I was Knight Commander.” He didn’t miss the shock in Cullen’s eyes. “Thus… I… may have… escorted a certain mage… on a short but rather important mission to gather specific herbs…” He shared a small knowing smile with Jess. “And we may… or may not have… simply slipped away in the night.”

Cullen could scarcely believe what he was hearing. “ _You_ were the Knight Commander that abandoned… eer… fled… um…” _It’s all right, go on…_ Markus chuckled at him. “I heard about that… I had to send a replacement down from Kirkwall but I never imagined it was you that I was sending a replacement for. Maker’s breath, Markus.”

Markus gave a shrug and a gesture that said he wasn’t sorry. “What can I say… they threatened my girl.” He felt Jess’ fingers comb some of his hair on the back of his neck. “After that… we… went home.”

Cullen’s features immediately turned confused but… well, of course Mia hadn’t told him, he hadn’t kept in contact with her that entire time. “I… I wish I had known.”

Markus smirked at him in a humorless fashion. “I don’t. No offense, Cullen, but you were in a very dark place at the time and the last person I wanted knowing where we were… was you.” He saw the hurtful acceptance on his face. “Jess’ parents had already passed on but my Mother was still alive. We had her with us for two winters before she passed on.” He waved off condolences. “We stayed on the farm for…” He looked up as the thought. _Three years._ Jess provided. He nodded in agreement. “Then the whole rebellion shit started.” He shook his head with a disapproving look. “And well…” He cleared his throat, obviously dodging some details but he.. he wouldn’t speak of them, not right now. But damned if Evelyn was too curious for her own good.

Evelyn smiled at the two of them. “I’m surprised you two don’t have any children.” The moment the words left her, she knew she had touched on a sensitive subject, the chill that swept around them was… unmistakable.

Cullen’s brows furrowed as he watched Markus go still, his jaw shift to the side… as Jess’ entire body went tense.

Jess… looked down at her bowl, her appetite having left her. “I… I need some air.” She said it quiet but quick, she stood just as fast… she twisted her wrist out of Markus’ sudden hold and made for the battlements.

Markus frowned deeply… his eyes cast down at the table as he shook his head slow… he visibly jumped and slammed his eyes shut when she, in turn, slammed the door. He held a hand up sharply to silence Evelyn when she started to speak an apology. It took him a moment…

Cullen looked at Markus carefully… what… he didn’t understand. Jess looked… he had never seen her spurn him before, granted, he hadn’t been around them in over a decade… but still. “Markus—“

Markus’ eyes flew open and pinned Cullen with a fierce expression. He leaned in a kept his voice low though it strained. “I only tell you this so you will know never to speak of it again.” He felt the familiar sting to his eyes, the way his nose started to itch… his throat go painfully tight. He looked between the two of them before he spoke… he couldn’t even speak loudly if he wanted to. “… We…” He took a deep breath and cursed low, scrubbing at his face. “When the vote came down… so called True Templars…” He sneered the name. “Came to our farm… they claimed… they had been sent to retrieve… me.” He shook his head again. “And her. They followed her philactory.” He felt that guilt anew, he… in his haste, he had forgotten it when they left the circle. “Naturally, we fought them… but…” He closed his eyes slow, shaking his head. “I thought he would be safe inside.” He whispered low to himself before clearing his throat. “Our son was killed. Samuel Ryan… he was…” He pinched his lips together for a moment before pushing through it. “Nearly two years old.” He cleared his throat and drank down the rest of his ale in one shot. “Please, do not ever mention children to Jess again.” He looked between them before looking harder at Cullen. “You have no idea how hard I had to fight to keep her with me.” He tapped on the table before he got up. “We’ll down in the camp… thanks for the meal.” He started to turn away, he heard chairs scraping, he held a hand up to Cullen to still him. “We’ll speak more tomorrow. For now… I need to go do damage control.”

Cullen… didn’t know what to think… he could only hurt on their behalf. They’d had a child… a part of them come together in a single person… and those they had both once called brothers… had been the cause of that child’s death. A son. Markus’ son. He nodded and let the man go before he looked back to his own woman… he just pulled her into his arms and held her… he couldn’t be bothered with where they were at. That… if nothing else… that right there made him realize even more why they had to succeed. They had to make this world better… so… should they ever… they wouldn’t suffer the same fate.


End file.
